I guess I can never know what’s going to hit me until I start reading, but as a child of divorce who knows what it feels like when it’s acrimonious, and as a woman with kids and an ex husband and all the understanding in the world about everything that comes after divorce with kids, this made me cry. I think it’s the best thing in the world when you can remain friends, and certainly better for the kids. I agree we all deserve medals and not a “failure label” - getting divorced is, in fact, an act of bravery and at least as much of a leap of faith as getting married. But no one buys you dishes lol. I loved this, needless to say. And your playing is so beautiful.
My favorite of these delightful videos is (of course) the one with your son, looking up at you as he plays. To your comment about the “failure” of divorce, which I have not experienced, do you know Jack Gilbert’s poem “Failing and Falling?” He presents the end of a relationship as reaching the end of a triumph.
I don’t and will look for it. Thanks Rona. Btw Starter Dog was mentioned today by my son… he’s so diverted by the idea of the new dog-person who has certain expectations. “Tell me about how she said the dog would never come up on the bed!”
talented musicians will bring me out of the woodwork everytime like beetlejuice😜
the last with your boy dutifully laying down the beat and of course the first which seemed to leech every bit of emotion into what is such an evocative song
This makes my heart sing. I can’t play anything; can’t even whistle. Never have I had more regret about getting sick every Tuesday when the piano teacher came.
So beautiful-you have a gift, and the love of it is what spreads the joy to the people around you as you share that gift with them. You are a lucky lady :)
Loved this Anna. Have you considered doing your own voiceovers? If your speaking voice is even just a fraction as expressive as your playing, it would be wonderful. To hear your voice read your stories would be an experience. Thanks!
I agree about the award, Bravery and Success in the Face of Everything Falling Apart. It's a lot to fit on a medal - maybe a certificate? My divorce was the second most difficult experience of my life. We remained friends, which puzzled a lot of people and flat out stymied my parents. If we could stay friends why couldn't we stay married was how they saw it. We both got remarried. And he had children! They are super duper smart just like him. I've gotten to know them a little as a result of the most difficult experience of my life, of all of our lives, probably - when he died. I grieved so hard for three years I feared I'd never be able to say his name again without bawling (and here I am crying just typing it). Maybe I never will. My husband has been my rock and I thank the universe every day for the gift of his understanding. I'm glad you and your ex are friends. Love takes many forms. Including musical. Thanks so much for sharing these precious videos especially, what a privilege to witness them.
This one just got me--the music, the words, the videos. Amazing writing. Thank you for your words about going through a divorce and how those who've done it (me, of course) deserve a medal. It's a fucking tsunami. Also, your boy is so adorable, i can't stand it.
Anna! This is so wonderful. We were away and I took a summer Substack break, and this is the most beautiful thing to come back to. It's such a moving piece of music, and I love the different feelings evoked by each version in each context, and the continuation, coming full circle. It's so lovely.
I've often thought that divorce/separation could be harder than dealing with a death and as you say there is very little sympathy from the world. Plus, you don't even get time to grieve.
That first video is something. My god, you're wearing it all over your face, poor girl!
I think we praise vulnerability a little too much in writing sometimes but this piece really moved me, and youre the real deal as a writer, so thanks, Anna.
"I think we praise vulnerability a little too much in writing sometimes" ...me too. Was not at all sure I wanted to post this, for that reason. But my husband really liked it! Go figure.
I like it
https://marlowe1.substack.com/p/job-chapter-21
I guess I can never know what’s going to hit me until I start reading, but as a child of divorce who knows what it feels like when it’s acrimonious, and as a woman with kids and an ex husband and all the understanding in the world about everything that comes after divorce with kids, this made me cry. I think it’s the best thing in the world when you can remain friends, and certainly better for the kids. I agree we all deserve medals and not a “failure label” - getting divorced is, in fact, an act of bravery and at least as much of a leap of faith as getting married. But no one buys you dishes lol. I loved this, needless to say. And your playing is so beautiful.
"But no one buys you dishes" is a good way to put it. Thank you, Ally.
I went with it for the restack lol
My favorite of these delightful videos is (of course) the one with your son, looking up at you as he plays. To your comment about the “failure” of divorce, which I have not experienced, do you know Jack Gilbert’s poem “Failing and Falling?” He presents the end of a relationship as reaching the end of a triumph.
I don’t and will look for it. Thanks Rona. Btw Starter Dog was mentioned today by my son… he’s so diverted by the idea of the new dog-person who has certain expectations. “Tell me about how she said the dog would never come up on the bed!”
Oh, so you're in the habit of describing the books you read to your son? No wonder he's such a delightful and wise young soul.
talented musicians will bring me out of the woodwork everytime like beetlejuice😜
the last with your boy dutifully laying down the beat and of course the first which seemed to leech every bit of emotion into what is such an evocative song
and of that particular geography
wow
Thanks for coming out! (I was so impressed how he stuck to that offbeat for so long!)
Just gorgeous Anna… that last video with your son 🥹
Thank you Susie!
Beautiful words and music and an important message of love and self love.
Thank you
Such beautiful music! 💕
Thank you!
This makes my heart sing. I can’t play anything; can’t even whistle. Never have I had more regret about getting sick every Tuesday when the piano teacher came.
Ha ha... I had a similar reaction to the piano teacher coming over... but it was last year!
So beautiful-you have a gift, and the love of it is what spreads the joy to the people around you as you share that gift with them. You are a lucky lady :)
Thank you David!
Loved this Anna. Have you considered doing your own voiceovers? If your speaking voice is even just a fraction as expressive as your playing, it would be wonderful. To hear your voice read your stories would be an experience. Thanks!
Thanks Ellen... Not a great speaker unfortunately, but appreciate the vote of confidence!
I agree about the award, Bravery and Success in the Face of Everything Falling Apart. It's a lot to fit on a medal - maybe a certificate? My divorce was the second most difficult experience of my life. We remained friends, which puzzled a lot of people and flat out stymied my parents. If we could stay friends why couldn't we stay married was how they saw it. We both got remarried. And he had children! They are super duper smart just like him. I've gotten to know them a little as a result of the most difficult experience of my life, of all of our lives, probably - when he died. I grieved so hard for three years I feared I'd never be able to say his name again without bawling (and here I am crying just typing it). Maybe I never will. My husband has been my rock and I thank the universe every day for the gift of his understanding. I'm glad you and your ex are friends. Love takes many forms. Including musical. Thanks so much for sharing these precious videos especially, what a privilege to witness them.
Thank you Sandra, and I'm so sorry for your loss.
This one just got me--the music, the words, the videos. Amazing writing. Thank you for your words about going through a divorce and how those who've done it (me, of course) deserve a medal. It's a fucking tsunami. Also, your boy is so adorable, i can't stand it.
Thanks Mary. Congrats! (to all of us)
That's some real, honest, beautiful writing about intimacy with others and ourselves and about music and what it can do.
I loved reading it Anna S
❤️
Oh I love this, the refrain of the same tune over the years in different situations. Very touching. It’s a beautiful piece of music, too.
Thanks Wendy!
Anna! This is so wonderful. We were away and I took a summer Substack break, and this is the most beautiful thing to come back to. It's such a moving piece of music, and I love the different feelings evoked by each version in each context, and the continuation, coming full circle. It's so lovely.
Thanks Rob, and welcome back!
I've often thought that divorce/separation could be harder than dealing with a death and as you say there is very little sympathy from the world. Plus, you don't even get time to grieve.
That first video is something. My god, you're wearing it all over your face, poor girl!
I think we praise vulnerability a little too much in writing sometimes but this piece really moved me, and youre the real deal as a writer, so thanks, Anna.
"I think we praise vulnerability a little too much in writing sometimes" ...me too. Was not at all sure I wanted to post this, for that reason. But my husband really liked it! Go figure.
Smart Guy